Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
