There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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