so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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