he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize