I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
