If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
