Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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