I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize