Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
