Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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