I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
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Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
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I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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