But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
