Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
