I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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