Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
