Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
