Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize