if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
