Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize