I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
