piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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