Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
just tell him i said nine months
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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