So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
