Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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