If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
