Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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