I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
