Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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