Got a toothbrush?
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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