you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
