Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
