Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
