Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
