I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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