keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
