if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
