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Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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