hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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