she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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