Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
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