He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
