Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
