first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
