I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
He better not be in your backpack
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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