Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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