I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
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I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
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So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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