Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
