: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
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