He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
