the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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