yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
