is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Floor bacon is actually really good
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