yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you