the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now